9-6-2021 Trying to stand on her own

(Tricia)

I was able to take one evening off on Saturday to have dinner with friends—a much appreciated distraction from all that is going on! But I did visit Linda briefly early Saturday evening before Ed came to sit with her, and she was surprisingly clear. She asked about the financial aspects of her medical care and what might be coming next. Ed says that, after I left, they chatted more about finances, as well as all that had happened before she came to NHC. She is still cannot believe that she was in a coma or had to stay in the hospital for so long.

Last night, Sunday, she was tired but was adamant that she wanted to get up on her own. Normally, Ed and I would explain that she needed to wait for the nurses to help, because we are so scared she will fall. But last night, when we told her that we were going to have to wait for the nurses, her demeanor was far more somber and defeated than usual. Her inability to get up and down on her own is draining her every day. So, we decided to at least let her try, while at the time being ready to get her back to bed at the slightest hint of trouble.

In reality, we truly thought that her muscles would fail her, as they had in the past. And, to some extent, they did. She still cannot stand on her own. She tried two times to get her legs under her and transfer to the wheelchair, but each time simply could not get her muscles to work. She got more and more dejected each time, and we thought she would lay herself back down. But after the second try, she asked us to hand her a can of Diet Coke that we had been pouring into a cup of ice for her. I asked, “Don’t you want the cup with the ice? The soda in the can is warm.” She shook her head vigorously and stuck out her hand. After I gave her the can, she tilted her head back and guzzled it down. We joked with her that she looked like Popeye downing his spinach before facing some feat of strength! 

And wouldn’t you know, the third try was the charm. As unhealthy as that darn diet soda is (she enjoys it so much, so we view it as a necessary evil), it worked to give her strength somehow.  Using the same heavy strap under her arms that the PTs use to provide additional support, we were able to help her stand up. And once she was up, her legs were strong enough to hold her own weight and even walk, with the help of a walker. As frustrated as she was at her inability to stand up on her own, that was a great thing to see. I’m hoping that, with more practice and PT, she will regain more of her strength over time. 

Another thing that has been really heartening is that she is starting to talk about the future. She has asked Marilyn about what it might take to redecorate her home, and she has talked with us about adopting a rescue dog (actually, rescue “dogs”!).  She is wondering aloud what kind of car she might buy, because she says that she doesn’t like the one she has now very much. All of this seems to indicate patterns of thought that had not been there for her previously—the ability to think ahead and make plans. 

Over the last few days, she has been so sad and frustrated that she cannot remember so many things and that she cannot control her own muscles. But still, it has been wonderful to hear her talk about the future, even if only in small ways. Now, we just have to see how far she can go toward actually making those plans a reality.